Being Lonely + Coffee = Heaven

“Loneliness adds beauty to life. It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.”

-Henry Rollins (American Rock Singer, Author, Actor, and Poet)

R.A.I.N: Room for An Inspirational Narrative

I woke up today and found that it was raining heavily outside. It was so cold that i was being very lazy sneaking up and down on my own bed. As a growing up teen, it has been becoming my habit seeing the world in twitter to start the day. Then there they were, on my timeline, cursing and hoping for the rain to stop. Yeah, a lot have said, and I could do nothing but agree, that rain can be a wall that ban people from doing their activities. Rain forces people to stay home or keeps people at any places from coming home. It forces people to watch, to see its beauty, and also the beauty of life. At the time people can not go anywhere nor do anything, they are forced to think, to brood over their life that actually has a lot of beautiful and inspiring story. Now, at half past seven in the morning, here i am, looking at the rain and feeling its sound, thinking about destiny and future, and life.

A piece of story that "forces" me to think about destiny comes from a plot in a movie. Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind. It is a story of a couple that undergo a procedure to erase the memory blah blah and blah. A very long and complex story actually-- you should watch that movie anyway (recommended)-- but refer to one big point, that soul mates, is destiny. No matter how hard people try to avoid, erase, run, or deny their mates, it will always come to them. Destiny will work in the way we do not understand to keep people on the way they should be, with the person they should be with, and on the places the should be.

Social network is the next thing that bring me another story inspires about future. There is this friend of mine, tweeted few days ago about future: No matter how uncertain future might seems, what belongs to you, comes to you. At the present days, every time i study at school, I am worrying about my future. Most of my friend have chosen the faculty they want, the job they want to take, or simply the future they want. I am the only one among them who still does not even know what to choose yet. As the system of universities in Indonesia is based on score, I am also worrying about my score. From the first grade of senior high school, my score has been decreasing fast like it jump from the highest cliff to its bottom. However, after reading that tweet, I feel like a stupid person, worrying about something I do not even know yet. Yeah it real, what belongs to you will come to you. As long as you work as hardest as you can, the future will be magical, in its own way.

So, life is not that complex. It is simply just today, yesterday, and tomorrow. Most of people are afraid of tomorrow. People get stressed, depressed, and tired in their days worrying about their tomorrow. They forget that the most important time in life is today. Future has its own surprise for people, a big big surprise. It is the best to color the day with the excitement to know what surprise the future might be giving us tomorrow.

At the end of story, I can still hear the sound of the rain tapping the roof, and the window. While it was raining, I was stuck and not able to go anywhere but here, at home, thinking about life, its beauty. Rain gives you room to think, about life, the greatest narrative ever. Be in that room and think. I have done that and this is my story. What's yours?

“I’ll tell you what I really loved: the version of Somebody to Love that was in Happy Feet. That was a fantastic version. It was great.”

- Roger Taylor (the drummer from Queen)
Somebody commented on youtube. And it is REALly great version

Resolusi

Tahun lalu, saya memutuskan untuk tidak memiliki resolusi. Sebenarnya punya sih, seingat saya hanya untuk memiliki sebuah kehidupan yang menyenangkan. Hell yeah, i had happy life last year. Tapi kalau dipikirkan lebih lanjut, sebuah kehidupan yang  menyenangkan terlalu luas untuk dijadikan sebuah resolusi, atau memang bukan sebuah resolusi. Jadi ya saya hidup selama 365 hari terakhir tanpa sebuah resolusi. Dari 365 hari yang melelahkan itu, saya akhirnya tiba pada suatu kesimpulan bahwa saya membutuhkan sebuah resolusi. Karena satu, saya tidak terlalu pintar dan dua, saya dalam satu dan lain hal berantakan dan butuh untuk dirapihkan.

Dari segala pengamatan, saya memang tidak pintar, atau lebih tepatnya tidak cerdas. Saya bukanlah seseorang yang bisa mempelajari apapun dengan cepat. Saya bukan seseorang yang bisa hidup dan tetap berjaya dalam kondisi apapun. Hal ini menjadikan saya tidak bisa hidup mandiri. Saya bisa hidup di dalam kehidupan yang diatur bukan sebuah kehidupan tanpa aturan dengan prinsip flow on the go. Dalam pikiran saya yang abstrak saya tahu apa saja yang harus saya lakukan, tetapi saya yang bukan cerdas ini memang tidak bisa mewujudkan abstrak tersebut menjadi sesuatu yang konkret. Untuk itu saya memang harus mulai mencatat, dan di awal tahun 2012 ini, saya rasa menulis apa-apa saja yang akan saya lakukan satu tahun ke depan adalah suatu permulaan yang baik untuk saya yang tidak pintar, atau lebih tepatnya tidak cerdas ini.

Kedua, saya memang berantakan. Keberantakan yang terjadi pada diri saya sebenarnya adalah hasil dari keadaan saya yang kurang cerdas. Satu tahun kebelakang, kehidupan saya secara struktur menjadi berantakan. Ada banyak hal yang harus saya lakukan dan saya tidak bisa mengingat semuanya. Ada banyak tujuan yang harusnya saya tetapkan sejak awal saya mulai melangkah. Tapi, karena saya tidak menetapkannya, kehidupan saya berjalan entah kemana. Jadi untuk merapihkannya, saya memutuskan untuk mempunyai resolusi.

Pada intinya tahun ini, saya memutuskan untuk memiliki resolusi. Ada banyak sebenarnya, namun saya terlalu  malu untuk menyebutkan poin-poin bodoh itu. Resolusi yang berhubungan dengan blog ini adalah saya akan tetap menghidupkan blog ini sepanjang tahun, so stay tune. 

Good Bye

There are a lot of things that can take us fly through our life in the past. There are some songs remind us of some moments in the rain, or in the hug of our family, or in some beautiful laughing moments with pals. There are some videos, or movies remind us of some places, some hard moment, or some magics turning us up to the top. There are also some pictures with a powerful and dangerous effect to our brain with making it thinks that we are in the different era, situation with different people, and different us. An easy example is this picture.

This picture brings me away to the very past moment in my childhood memory when I was a very kid and that was a lot of time at home for just playing, sleeping, watching TV and read some silly books (just like the winnie the pooh yeah haha). It is really working for me, and I personally think it was really beautiful. I mean, in every time we're listening to the clock on our wall ticking on every second, we know that we are all changing. We are all growing and changing. Our self is not what we used to be, and our family, friends, teachers and people that we may not know are also not what they used to be. Our world is now running on the big and fast transformation and we have to join it. The question is whether we want it or not, but we are ready or not.

Well that was just an stupid intermezzo from me (yeah i know i'm silly okay, just stop). All i'm going to say is written on that inspiring picture:

"If there ever comes a day when we can't be together, keep me in your heart, and I'll stay forever."

Honestly, I really want to dedicate this to my family which is going to be leaving. I have done an awesome year, and lot of great moments with this family. We have been very successful on fighting for the heavy streams of our tears with standing together, holding each other hands and making a good team family.

We have been running together for at least a year. We have known at the beginning that we are going to face the hardest problem of the year, which is the goodbye. We have known that there will be a day that we cannot be together anymore, that there will be a day we are taking the different road and waving our hand to say goodbye to each of us. We have known that we are going to have tears again not only for the hard moments but also all beautiful and great moments we have been through. We have known that one day we are going to be standing alone and walking alone, that we are going to meet a whole new world and new faces, that we are going to have a new family somewhere we will really belong.

Today is the day. The day that we have to say goodbye, whether it is hard or not. This is the day when we cannot be together anymore. In the end, I want to say that we have had each other in our hearts. I will keep this family deep inside my heart, to make it stay forever there. Now, I really want you, my family, keep me inside your heart, and I will really stay forever in each and every hearts of yours.

Wave your hand, to make it easier for saying goodbye -Bima

Source Of The Code (Source Code, huh? -___-)

"This world's s*ck!"

Don't tell me you disagree. We can see in the advancement of the technology that we can barely see the friendly faces from the people walking with their head down straight to their phones, laptops, and tablets. Then don't tell me you are not worried seeing a lot of free sex leading to a lot of killing diseases, or seeing the non-hearted people who cut our trees greedily for money, or seeing other greedy officials having fun for their own happiness with the people's money. I agree and not to mention that I do care. I do care, and then I realized that running from those problem is not the best solution.

I watched the Source Code few moments ago. It was a great movie with a lot of physic stuff and unpredictable story (really recommended). At the beginning it was like inception thing and more like science fiction movies. I kept watching and got more interested with the movie. The story got more complex and inspiring. The ending which is my favorite was the most inspiring part of the movie.

At the ending, there was this man who is about to crash the world as the result of his thought that the world's s*ck. From many point of view, let us see this man is having good motives to make a better world so that he can take away the world from suffering. Then let's see it from the process, that he is trying to create a new world, thinking that it is the best solution for the world. Let's see that after he create a new world, he will leave the world he lives in with the unsolved problem behind. At the end, let's conclude that he is running away instead of standing bravely facing those hard problems.

At the very end (of the movies), after taking control of the man, the main character (Jake Gyllenhaal) who has refused to be agree with the man, choose to do different way to the world. Instead of crashing the world to pieces, he choose to make the oldies, some man controlled by their laptops, some individualist, and a lot of people who do not know each other being united and laugh together. It was just beautiful for sure.

taken from youtube

In short, do not ever think to run from your problem instead of facing it. You really do not want to feel the regret of the choice you did not do, the choice to solve your problem. There must be a way out from every problem. Why don't we stand together facing those tiring problem. Why don't we unite our people like Jake Gyllenhaal do in the movie. Stop crashing our world, and start building it.

FABULOUS!

Hello blogger. I really really owe you an apology for being a bad blogger haha. I mean it's been a month since the last time I posted. My activities at school has been very tough even in holiday. I apology once again.

Last Friday night, GTC Choir held its biggest program in a year: Fabuluous Concert!

and this is the poster of tabulous (or jabulous haha but the maker mean it to be fabulous)

We spent many months learning and practicing about twenty songs to be sung at the concert. We spent about six hours every saturdays preparing for the concert. Both tiring and exciting.

D-6, it was just like another rehearsal. We had the running from the beginning, fixing some parts. And I did not feel anything yet. The next rehearsal, D-4, not so different. We had running again, another correction in some parts. D-3, coach told us to bring high heels (girls) and pumps (boys). We practiced also about stepping into and out from the stage stuffs. We had running, session break. I thought that wow it's getting more serious. D-2, the last rehearsal, and I was not in a mood to focus on the songs. During that day, I was so sleepy and I could barely remember whether I sung right notes or not. D-1, coach told us to stay at home. I did not feel anything still, and not recognize that the next day was really seriously a real concert. I was doing a lot of stuffs, watching movies, playing the sims, going to youtube, reviewing songs, and also sleep a lot haha.

The next day which is the D day, I started to be panic. I listed all things I had to bring, put them into the backpack. I prepared my self, took shower, brushed my teeth, washed my face. I went to school with a lot of stuffs to be brought. I carried my backpack on my shoulders and thought if I bring too many stuffs. I arrived at school at 9 am, thirty minutes early to have a meeting (wow -__-) talking about the orientation of the new students. We went to erasmus huis at 11 by bus and arrived there at about 12.

We had a very last rehearsal there. The rehearsal for the second session held on the last minutes (one hour before the concert). At the middle of the rehearsal, one of our great officials told us that the audiences have been so crowded and they were going to let them in. So, we hurriedly got out from the stage straight to the backstage. After that, we had the concert.

on the stage

after the concert

End of the concert, I felt like wow that's it. It is what we're practicing for. The applause and the standing O's we got paid for all the months. Wow, it was a lot of great times :).

P.S. thank you a lot to the official for helping us a lot.

Trip To Jatiluhur Cave and Dieng

Last week, I had a study tour with my school for three days. I brought a little backpack for my clothes and a small bag for my gadgets. I left the backpack at bus' luggage and brought the small bag, where I put hand phone, MP4, and digital camera in, almost everywhere. I took a lot of pictures with my camera, had a lot of fun from there.

my name tag. oh my name, haha it was written so bad because I wrote it on the bumpy ride at bus (taken by me)

Our first destination is Jatiluhur Cave. We arrived there at the evening and it was so dark there. We should have been there at 4 but we were so out of the schedule. At the beginning, I was a little afraid to get into the cave in the dark, but fortunately, it did not as bad as that because they put a lot of lamps there. About the view inside, it was perfectly amazing. We walked at a small bridge between the big rocks and enjoyed some statues there. We also passed the underground river. I actually wanted to touch the water but the time and the crowd didn't allow me. next time maybe. I didn't realize that i was very sweaty until I got out of the cave. haha it was hot, really.

inside the cave (taken by: Muhammad Taqiyuddin)

the underground river

The next day, we went to Dieng plateau. We did not go there by the bus from the tour agency but by the public bus from the nearest city. The temperature there was so cold that we did not need the air conditioner anymore. We were divided into 11 small buses and I got bus number 5. We got a very challenging road for our stomach on our way to Dieng plateau with a lot of climbs and curves. However, we got perfect view at Telaga Warna and Sikidang Crater.

the condition in the bus

The view at Telaga Warna was perfectly breathtaking. Although we did not see any changing of the lake's color, we was still amazed. The view of Sikidang Crater was also breathtaking. Our visit to the crater really took our breath away. The smell from the crater was so strong that it was a little hard for us to breath. Some of us chose to close our mouth and nose so as to avoid the smell. It was really fun for sure.

the condition of the lake, pretty awesome

the edelweiss which we found at the front gate

the view at the crater, i love the rock which is surrounded by the smoke haha awesome

another view of the crater

The Stars Were Stolen (Starmotion)

Three stars in the sky were lost. We stole them and put them at the top of our stage. They started shining at our stage from 8 p.m. at the morning. The whole crew and I proudly brought these stars to you as the mascot of AKSI 34 STARMOTION!!!

That was the ticket of AKSI 34 STARMOTION

That was the stage with ALEXA (our guest star) on it.

Last saturday (9/4) the student organization of my school held a big event as the ending of our long journey of celebrating our school's birthday. This event has been successful in entertaining people with our performances of showcase, kolabs, intern band, guest star and a lot of other performances. Few great people (Kak Gelda, Kak Wildhan, Monda) and I was assigned to be responsible for showcase. And I am the operator

That was my laptop condition when I was an operator on showcase. So my job was controlling all non-live music and dubbing for the colaboration on showcase. And just for your information, that was not an easy job. It was really hard especially if I didn't know anything about the music they wanted me to play. They sometimes needed me to pause the music in some spot, and some of them didn't tell me. My job was getting harder with the less coordination of some colaborations. The showcase performance was depending on me, and it felt so nervous to be like that. Hfft... but it was fun. Seriously.

The showcase and AKSI it self ran so great. Although our event were out so far from the schedule, but it was great. When i was operating the showcase, i took a look at the crowd and they mostly enjoyed our showcase performance. Starting from there, intern band, kolabs and a lot of guest stars took control of the stage and has been successful in entertaining the crowd.

Last year i came to AKSI 33 and felt very great to come. This year, i was the crew and I don't feel the same as what I felt last year. I was so happy this year not because I was satisfied with the event, but because I've felt the feeling to be a crew, and the solidarity among the crew. It was a great time to go home so late, getting my self burnt by the sun for the fund raising and for the showcase. Sweet :).

Go to organization around you and join it!-Bima

Laugh Out Loud

hey sooo long time no see haha. I don't know, i've been thinking about you for a lot of times, but when i'm finally here in front of my laptop to say hello to you, my brain's stuck and I don't know anything to write. So i usually leave the page and go to youtube or twitter. That was it until today i was finally here again and still didn't have any idea. So I went to youtube and (finally... thanks God :D) got some ideas for you. But before starting, it's better that you see this video (i got it from youtube) first.

That is actually a cover from kamga (one personil of TANGGA) and his girlfriend, but they did some mistakes and laugh so loud until i also laughed when i watched them laughing (take a look at 1:13, pay attention to kamga's voice after that). Haha i still think that it's funny. Okay this' just a start. Have you got the topic? Come on i've given you the clues. Anyone???......... Okay it is about laughter. Hahahahahaha let's start.

Laugter is one of the topics which was discussed at LIA. In one lesson, we discussed about the laughter and how it can be good for your health. The lesson made us discussed about a lot of benefits of laughter. Because of my curiousity, i asked GOOGLE for help and find some facts about laughter. Just click here to read more.

I honestly don't know if it really makes my body healtier or not but i feel like there's something inside my body going out everytime I laugh my head off. In this so-hard time, i often feel stressed of school stuff, and all the activity I get in school. I never tried to laugh until this evening, i watched that video and laughed out loud. Haha, it felt so good, and i'm better now.

But as usual, the good things will be good in the right place, in the right time, and in the right quantities. To laugh so often until you have no time left to do other task (over -___-) will not make you feel better. It is okay to have a little laughter between your stressing activity, but laughing the whole day? Oh come on, people will think that you are one of the prisoner at the nearest mental hospital, seriously.

That's all. haha keep laughing!! -Bima

Depressed

I just read one posting in my very great senior's blog, Kak Bimo (seseorang dengan nama yang sama dengan gue, o dan a gak beda jauh lah). The posting sounds so depressed, but all the things that is happening in my life now, is exactly what the posting sounds about. I don't know, but for the first time in this year, i will tell you about my depression.

Gue adalah tipe orang yang lebih suka menyimpan semua perasaan dan kegalauan hati gue sendiri. Bahkan, beberapa saat dulu, beberapa orang sering berfikir bahwa gue adalah seorang anak manja yang gak punya masalah apapun, hidup dengan kehidupan yang sempurna dan penuh kesenangan. Ya ini adalah salah satu akibat dari sifat penutup gue. Buat gue, untuk apa membagikan masalah kita ke orang lain selama kita bisa memberikan senyuman untuk orang lain. But now as all the things around me is changed, pikiran gue pun berubah.

So what's the matter? Penyebab yang sama yang membuat senior gue yang hebat itu gundah, masalah akademik.

Di semester pertama, Allah sepertinya telah terlalu membuai gue. Nilai-nilai gue bagus di awal tahun, remed sedikit. Buaian yang sebenarnya diimpikan oleh banyak orang. Tapi buaian seperti itu bukanlah hal yang seharusnya diberikan kepada gue dengan mental yang lebih lembek dari tanah liat yang sedang dibentuk, karena justru buaian seperti itu yang justru membuat gue terlelap terlalu lama dalam buaian.

Gue terbuai, dan keterbuaian gue itu membuat keadaan gue jadi sangat menyedihkan, nilai yang pas-pasan di tengah orang-orang yang justru nilainya menaik. You know it feels like I fell from the highest place in the world when I saw my score for sociology is the lowest in the class. I used to have a smile in my face when I looked at my exam result. And it's so sweet to be remembered, and also very sad when i remember that i do not feel grateful of those good things i got.

Well satu-satunya hal yang bisa gue ucapkan mengenai ini adalah bahwa roda kehidupan terus berputar, dan gue sedang berada di posisi yang paling dekat dengan tanah. Dan yang gue bisa lakukan untuk menghibur diri gue sendiri saat ini adalah bahwa suatu saat nanti gue akan ada di posisi atas sana, melihat diri gue dan dunia gue tersusun rapi kembali. Dan saat gue ada di posisi itu, gue ingin memastikan diri gue bersyukur, bukannya mengeluh.

Dulu gue sering berfikir, untuk apa membagikan masalah kita ke orang lain selama kita masih bisa memberikan senyuman untuk orang lain. Tapi setelah beberapa waktu, dan beberapa hal yang telah gue alami, gue berani menyimpulkan di setiap kisah depresi ada kisah, dan ekspektasi gue adalah bukan agar kalian bersimpati kepada gue tapi lebih kepada pelajaran yang bisa kalian ambil. do what i didn't do, and do not do the mistake i did.